Dating
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Dating Is A Weighted Scale
It has become common to use the terms “red flag” and “green flag” to describe someone’s qualities, particularly when developing romantic connections. According to Merriam-Webster, the term “red flag” was first used in 1748 and meant “a warning signal or sign” or “something that indicates or draws attention to a problem, danger, or irregularity.” Dating Continue reading
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Audacity Or The Law of Averages
Sometimes, I’m amazed by what guys say on dating apps. It could be because of the supposed anonymity of the screen. I can’t imagine they would say any of this stuff in person. This rule should be a litmus test for men: If you can’t say it to a random person in a coffee shop, Continue reading
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Recycled Relationships
Five months ago, I decided to reconnect with a past relationship. This is someone who has a lot of history with me and would occasionally message me, either through DMs or emails. To give some context, depending on who I’m with, I can either have an anxious or avoidant attachment style. With this particular person, Continue reading
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When Romantic Comedies Turn Into Comic Tragedies
Some dates are just destined to be failures. I had this romantic fantasy once that the ideal date would begin in a bookstore, where we would drink coffee and maybe pick out books for each other. We would fall madly in love with each other, live happily ever after……………… That is different from how it Continue reading
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You May Be The Problem
Part of trying to have a healthy relationship is identifying why past relationships haven’t worked- what is the general theme? For me, it has been various reasons; however, the underlying issue is that they are emotionally unavailable or have difficulty forming emotional bonds. In addition, this behavior has manifested in them not treating me well. Continue reading
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My First Internet Date
Approximately ten years ago, I took my first foray into online dating. We exchanged messages, and he seemed like a nice enough guy. We had several things in common, at least on screen. The first date was set for a coffee house that served alcohol in the evening. We met inside, and the first thing Continue reading
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Seriously, Does Anyone Read The Profiles
I get these comments, waves, likes, and swipe rights. And it never ceases to amaze me when I go to their profiles and read them. I know that humans are visual creatures, both men and women, and they see a picture and say “yes.” Still, It is apparent that people are not dating with intention Continue reading
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Sexual Health And Peace Of Mind
There is something to be said for regular screenings for sexually transmitted infections when dating and going to be sexually active. Recently, I saw accidently saw a copious amount of amateur porn on a date’s phone. At the time, I felt like he was gaslighting me when he blamed me for seeing it when I Continue reading
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Things Not To Write In Your Dating Profile: Part One
When writing a dating profile, think of it like a resume. Apart from the obvious, putting not enough information, sometimes there is too much information. People can have a mixture of their best qualities while listing some of the things they are working on. Here are some of the common mistakes that I see in Continue reading
About Me
When did life get so complicated? I started this blog last year after a tough breakup and named it ‘Dating Is A Dumpster Fire.’ The blog was less about the breakup and more about the comically tragic dates that I kept going on. The effort to find a mate has led me down a path of healing from past trauma and becoming my best self. Somewhere along the way, life has thrown more challenges and left me with fewer dating prospects. Perhaps the best version of myself is single with a cat.
Life Is A Dumpster Fire 